Funny Friday: Mr. and Mrs. Forgetful

Funny Friday: Mr. and Mrs. Forgetful

Happy Friday Friends!

What a week!! It’s been exciting to say the least. My sister-in-law has moved into town from Texas and I’m really excited about it. She is such an amazing person and I can’t wait to get to know her better.

I haven’t done a Funny Friday in a while because I’ve been so busy with God’s calling for my life; my family and my ministry. My church has blessed me with the oppurtunity to lead a small group called Freedom In Christ for Women Small Group. Have you guys heard of the Freedom In Christ ministry by Neil Anderson?

Click on this link, Freedom In Christ, to learn more about it. I will talk it more about another day, but for now let’s get to the funny of the day.

Mr. and Mrs. Forgetful

There was an elderly couple who in their old age noticed that they were getting a lot more forgetful, so they decided to go to the doctor. The doctor told them that they should start writing things down so they dont forget. They went home and the old lady told her husband to get her a bowl of ice cream. “You might want to write it down,” she said. The husband said, “No, I can remember that you want a bowl of ice cream.” She then told her husband she wanted a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream. “Write it down,” she told him, and again he said, “No, no, I can remember: you want a bowl of ice crem with whipped cream.” Then the old lady said she wants a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream and a cherry on top. “Write it down,” she told her husband and again he said, “No, I got it. You want a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream and a cherry on top.” So he goes to get the ice cream and spends an unusually long time in the kitchen, over 30 mintues. He comes out to his wife and hands her a plate fof eggs and bacon. The old wife stares at the plate for a moment, then looks at her husband and asks, “Where’s the toast?”

I pray that you guys had a wonderful week. Please remember to pray for one another.

In the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, and sharing of pleasures. For in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed. -Khalil Gibran

 

 

Funny Friday

Funny Friday

Good Morning Friends,

This week has been uneventful, but draining at the same time. My mentor called me the other day to check to see if I have been experiencing any spiritual attacks from the enemy. At the time, everything was ok. See, last weekend, I shared my testimony with a group of people who are interested in walking in freedom with Jesus. They want to leave their old baggage behind and start their new life in Jesus (Ephesians 2:4-7) knowing who they are in Jesus; loved, adored, and free from the enemies lies.

Well, a couple of weeks leading up to giving my testimony, I was being attacked in all areas of my life, but I did was God requests of me, which is lean on Him and trust that “this too shall pass”. And it did. I gave my testimony and a lot of people became free. The Holy Spirit came and moved a lot of people to freedom. It was such a beautiful thing to witness.

So, when my mentor reached out to me, I thought, “Hmmm…I got this one in the bag. I’m not being attacked. I got a handle on this.” I was so wrong. I was being attacked, I just hadn’t realized it yet. First, it started with old hurt by family members. Then, I began to uncontrollably worry about my children. Then, my marriage, my household, and finally depression and anxiety. What is one to do when it feels like the whole world is against you? Stand still in the presence of the Lord. You want to know why? Because the whole world is against you! Satan is the god of this world (2 Corinthians 4:4) and he is out to kill, steal, and destroy (John 10:10). I know his goal is to use my circumstances to draw me away from God, even hate him, but I’m over those days of allowing the enemy to take my joy.

Bad days will happen. I know this. I also know everyone will not always be in agreement with me on certain topics or decisions I make in my life, but this is my life. God has trusted me with it. We are far from perfect creatures, but Gods love is so sufficient, that it can literally get us through any and every season of our lives.

Recently, I’ve spoken to a lot of believers who feel the heavy weight of the burdens of the world on their shoulders and if this is you, I’m here to tell you that it is not your burden to bear. It’s literally the reason why Jesus died for us on this cross. To free us from shame, guilt, rejection, abandonment, etc. so we can experience the full righteousness of God by His grace, mercy, and love. Praise be to the Lamb! In the near future, I want to begin talking about how powerful Gods love is and how, during good and bad times, we need to tap into that love to get us through, but for now, please pray for me that I am able to have the energy and stamina to do such a task.

For now, I will shut down my soapbox and introduce you to today’s Funny Friday. We all need laughter, some more than others and I pray whoever is reading this, that it is able to put a smile on your face. Enjoy, beloveds and please remember to pray for one another. Thank you for reading my thoughts. I pray they bless someone today. In Jesus’ wonderful, all mighty name. Amen.

The Pastor, The Boy Scout, and The Wall Street Analyst

The pastor, the boy scout, and a brilliant wall street hedge fund manager were all flying in a small plane together. In flight, the plane developed catastrophic mechanical issues, so the pilot went to the three passengers and announced that the plane was going down. Unfortunately, he added, “There are only three parachutes, even though there are four of us on board. I should have one of the parachutes because I have a wife and three small children.” So he promptly took one and jumped.

The Wall Street analyst said, “I should get a parachute because I’m one of the smartest men in the world, and the world needs me.” So he took one and jumped. 

The pastor and the Boy Scout looked at each other. Then the pastor volunteered, “I know the Lord. I’m not afraid to die. You’re young and have your whole life ahead of you. You take the remaining parachute and I’ll go down with the plane.”

The Boy Scout smiled and said, “No worries, Pastor. One of the smartest men in the world just put on my backpack and jumped out!”

Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. -2 Corinthians 12:9

Funny Friday

Funny Friday

Hey Friends!

I’m so glad to be back. Writing is the source of my calm. Even if I wanted to stop ✋, I couldn’t! It’s my life’s passion. It’s like breathing for me. Do you have a passion like that? Do you find yourself missing something that used to be your “calm”?💆🏽‍♀️ Make sure you make it a priority to get back to doing whatever made your heart flutter. 💕We all need a healthy escape from life sometimes. 😉

Anyway, welcome back to Funny Friday! I pray that you all have a wonderful weekend filled with many blessings and Gods endless grace and love. Please remember to pray for one another and don’t forget to laugh! 🤗

A BUS FULL OF UGLY PEOPLE

A bus full of ugly people had a head on collision with a truck. When they died, God granted all of them one wish. The first person said, “I want to be gorgeous.” God snapped his fingers and it happened. The second person said the same thing and God did the same thing. This want on and on throughout the group. God noticed the last man in line was laughing hysterically. By the time God got to the last ten people, the last man was laughing and rolling on the ground. When the man’s turn came, he laughed and said, “I wish they were all ugly again.”

Funny Friday: 1st Grade Answers

Funny Friday: 1st Grade Answers

Hey Friends,

Welcome to Funny Friday!!! I pray you all are having a wonderful start to your weekend. This week has been filled with unexpected blessings and fruitful experiences. God has been rewarding me for my growth and it has been absolutely beautiful. My frustration and anxiety have been down AND I taught a small group for the very first time at my church. It went really well and I can’t wait to do it again. It may seem small, but one thing I am learning is to celebrate the small stuff; that is what makes life more enjoyable.

 

 

Ok! Enough about me. Let’s get to why you’re really here. Time to laugh your butt off with today’s joke brought to you by www.Inspire21.com.

1st grader answers

A first-grade teacher had twenty-five students in her Clarkston, MI class. She presented each child in her class the first half of a well-known proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. It’s hard to believe these were actually done by first graders. Their insight may surprise you. While reading, keep in mind that these are just 6-year-olds because the last one is classic.

1. Don’t change horses……………………… until they stop.
2. Strike while the……………………………. bug is close.
3. It’s always darkest before………………. Daylight Saving Time.
4. Never underestimate the power of….. termites.
5. You can lead a horse to water but……. how?
6. Don’t bite the hand that………………… looks dirty.
7. No news is…………………………………… impossible.
8. A miss is as good as a……………………. Mister.
9. You can’t teach an old dog new………. math.
10. If you lie down with dogs, you’ll…….. stink in the morning.
11. Love all, trust……………………………… me.
12. The pen is mightier than the…………. pigs.
13. An idle mind is……………………………. the best way to relax.
14. Where there’s smoke there’s………… pollution.
15. Happy the bride who…………………….gets all the presents.
16. A penny saved is…………………………. not much.
17. Two’s company, three’s………………… the Musketeers
18. Don’t put off till tomorrow what……. you put on to go to bed.
19. Laugh and the whole world laughs
with you, cry and……………………….. you have to blow your nose.
20. There are none so blind as……………. Stevie Wonder.
21. Children should be seen and not……. spanked or grounded.
22. If at first you don’t succeed…………… get new batteries.

23. You get out of something only
what you………………………………….. see in the picture on the box.
24. When the blind lead the blind……….. get out of the way.

25. Better late than………………………….. pregnant.

 

Thank you all for sticking with me and I pray you all have a safe and wonderful weekend. Love you all and please remember to pray for one another.

The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter. -Mark Twain

Funny Friday: Kids Say The Darnedest Things!

Funny Friday: Kids Say The Darnedest Things!

Hey Family!

Welcome to Friday AND the first day of Fall! Whoop! Whoop! This is absolutely my favorite time of year for 2 reasons; the beautiful fall weather and it’s my birthday!! Yayyy!

Your girl is turning 33 tomorrow! Holy Moly! I can’t believe it. Oddly enough, I’m just now starting to feel like I’m “adulting”. 😁 I’m in a great place in life and God is AWESOME-SAUCE!

Today’s Funny Friday is brought to you by BoredPanda.com. I hope you enjoy and I pray your weekend is as beautiful as God’s wonderful Fall colors. Love you all and please remember to pray for one another.

Funny Friday: How To Tie A Tie

Funny Friday: How To Tie A Tie

Hey Friends,

Hay, hay it’s Friday! This weekend is exciting because my two little nuggets will be turning 10 and 12 years old. I still can’t believe I’m a mom to a preteen. The past 12 years have gone by so fast. I’m thanking God every day that he has given me the chance to be their mom. All my children are great kids; polite, funny, kind, considerate, warm-hearted…I can go on and on about how wonderful they are. They are truly the reason I’m still alive.

Anywho, let’s get to it. Today’s Funny Friday is brought to you by GreatCleanJokes.com because you know of course this is a Christian, family blog and I have to have clean jokes on here. Although I must confess, I’m always tempted to throw some dirty ones on here every once in a while. I hope you enjoy it.

I pray that each of you enjoys this wonderful weekend. Please remember to pray for one another.

On the day of my big job interview, I woke up late. Frantically I threw on a suit. “OH NO!” I thought. “MY TIE! My Dad was out of town and wasn’t there to help me, and for the life of me I did not know how to tie a tie! I grabbed a tie and ran out the door. “Excuse me sir,” I said to the crossing guard, “I have an important job interview, can you please help me make this tie?!” “Sure” said the guard, “just lie down on this bench.” Well if someone was going to help me I wasn’t going to ask any questions. After he finished and the tie looked good I just had to ask why I had to lie down. “Well in my previous job I learned how to tie tie’s on other people when they were lying down. He replied. What was your previous job? I asked incredulously. “I ran a morg.” Was the reply.

Funny Friday: Three Brothers

Funny Friday: Three Brothers

Hey Friends,

Happy Friday! Please enjoy today’s Funny Friday joke brought to you by Sunny Skyz.com

I pray that you all are having a wonderful start to your weekend. Love you all and please remember to pray for one another.

Three Brothers Age 92, 94 And 96 Live Together

One night the 96-year-old draws a bath, puts his foot in and pauses. He yells down the stairs, “Was I getting in or out of the bath?”

The 94-year old yells back, “I don’t know, I’ll come up and see.” He starts up the stairs and pauses, then he yells, “Was I going up the stairs or coming down?”

The 92-year-old was sitting at the kitchen table having coffee listening to his brothers. He shakes his head and says, “I sure hope I never get that forgetful.” He knocks on wood for good luck.

He then yells, “I’ll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who’s at the door.”

Funny Friday: Don’t Make Me Get My Belt

Funny Friday: Don’t Make Me Get My Belt

Good Day, Friends!

Welcome to Funny Friday!

Today, I would like to share a video that I’m sure most us can relate to. If not, please enjoy a great laugh, while the rest of us have flash backs of when our moms used these infamous one-liners!

Have a wonderful, blessed Friday. Please remember to pray for one another. Love you all!

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Funny Friday: A Trip To The Doctor

Funny Friday: A Trip To The Doctor

Hey Friends!

Welcome back to Funny Friday! Woop, Woop!

I’ve been absent for the past couple of Friday’s, but God has been so good to me I had to share a laugh with you guys. 🤣🤗😁

Please enjoy!

Love. Peace. Happiness in Jesus.

A TRIP TO THE DOCTOR

A woman and her husband go to the doctor because the woman is complaining of shortness of breath. After fifteen minutes, the woman comes out into the waiting room and says, “Apparently, my problem is that I have a nice cooter.”

“Excuse me?” says the husband.

“That’s what the doctor said. My problem is that I have a nice cooter.” The husband is a bit angry and goes in to talk to the doctor.

“What’s this about my wife having a nice cooter? I need a damn good explanation.”

“That’s not what I said,” replies the doctor. “I said she has acute angina.”

Funny Friday: Why You Should Make Love Once A Year

Funny Friday: Why You Should Make Love Once A Year

Hey Friends,

So, I’ve been M.I.A (missing in action) for the past few days due to a Lupus flare and a couple of other health issues, but the Lord has been good to me the entire time (as he promises) and your girl is almost back to 100% tip-top shape. Just in time for…

Funny Friday!!!

 

 

 

So, please enjoy today’s joke brought to you by www.RD.com. I pray that each and every one of you is having a wonderful start to your weekend and please don’t forget to have a Funny Friday! 🙂

Why You Should Make Love Once A Year

A therapist has a theory that couples who make love once a day are the happiest. So he tests it at a seminar by asking those assembled, “How many people here make love once a day?” Half the people raise their hands, each of them grinning widely. “Once a week?” A third of the audience members raise their hands, their grins a bit less vibrant. “Once a month?” A few hands tepidly go up. Then he asks, “OK, how about once a year?”

One man in the back jumps up and down, jubilantly waving his hands. The therapist is shocked—this disproves his theory. “If you make love only once a year,” he asks, “why are you so happy?”

The man yells, “Today’s the day!”

 

Funny Friday: The Man and Ostrich

Funny Friday: The Man and Ostrich

Namaste Friends!

Is it Friday already? I guess it is cause I have a joke for you! I hope everyone is having a wonderful start to their weekend. Please enjoy today’s Funny Friday by SunnyDayz.com

A Guy Walks Into A Restaurant With A Full-Grown Ostrich Behind Him…

The waitress asks for their orders. The guy says, “A hamburger, fries, and a coke,” and turns to the ostrich, “What’s yours?”

“I’ll have the same,” says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress returns with the order. “That will be $18.40 please.” The man reaches into his pocket and, without looking, pulls out the exact change for payment.

The next day, the guy and the ostrich come again and the guy says, “A hamburger, fries, and a coke.”

The ostrich says, “I’ll have the same.”

Again the guy reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change. This becomes routine until one night they enter the restaurant and the waitress asks, “The usual?”

“No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato, and salad”, says the guy.

“Me too,” says the ostrich.

The waitress brings the order and says, “That will be $42.62.”

Once again the guy pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table. The waitress can’t hold back her curiosity any longer. “Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change out of your pocket every time?”

“Well,” says the guy, “several years ago I was cleaning my attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it a genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there.”

“That’s brilliant!” says the waitress. “Most people would wish for a million dollars or something, but you’ll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!”

“That’s right. Whether it’s a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there,” says the guy.

The waitress asks, “But, sir, what’s with the ostrich?”

The guy sighs and answers, “My second wish was for a tall chick with long legs who agrees with everything I say.”

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Funny Friday: Preacher’s Wife

Funny Friday: Preacher’s Wife

Hey Friends!

Praise the Lord it’s Friday…and a beautiful Friday at that. Here in St. Louis, the sun is shining, the birds are chirping, and everyone that I love woke up this morning. Thank you, Jesus!

Please enjoy today’s Funny Friday joke brought to you by LaffGaff.com. Thank you all for your continued support. Jesus and I love each and every one of you. Have a wonderful start to your weekend.

Preachers Wife

A couple were going on a vacation together but the wife had an emergency at work. So they agreed the husband would go as planned and his wife would meet him at the hotel the next day.

When the husband got to his hotel and had checked in, he thought he should send his wife a quick email letting her know he’d got there ok.

As he typed in her email address, he made a typo and his email was sent to an elderly preacher’s wife instead. It just so happened that her husband had sadly died just the day before.

When the grieving preacher’s wife checked her emails, she read the one from the holidaymaker, let out an awful, loud, piercing scream, and fainted on the floor.

At the sound of her falling, her family rushed into the room. They tended to her and then looked at her computer and saw this email on her screen:

“Dearest Wife,

Just checked in to my room. Everything is prepared for your arrival tomorrow.

P.S. It sure is hot down here.”

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Funny Friday: Torn Throat

Funny Friday: Torn Throat

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Hey Friends!

Happy Friday! I hope you all have had a productive week and I pray that your weekend will be even more awesome-sauce! Please enjoy today’s Funny Friday brought to you by BoredPanda.com.

Stay blessed and have a wonderful Funny Friday 🙂

I am an ER doc. I once had a 20-year-old and his girlfriend comes in at 2 am freaking out because “something had torn his throat open”. He seemed fine. No blood. Breathing fine. I had him open his mouth, saw nothing. So didn’t want him to lose confidence in me, clearly, something had happened, so I’m looking, and looking….there is nothing wrong with this kids throat. Finally, I say look, it seems ok…what do you feel or see? “I don’t feel it but LOOK ITS RIGHT THERE”. WHERE??? Looking, looking. It was his uvula. Somehow this kid had gotten to the age of 20 without ever noticing his uvula. Girlfriend was also horrified…I told them it was normal. Did not believe me. So I told them I was about to blow their minds and showed him his girlfriends uvula. Minds were blown, another life saved in the ER.

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Funny Friday

Funny Friday

Oh crap! I’ve been so wrapped up in mental wellness, I almost forgot to post today’s Funny Friday. Why didn’t anyone tell me? Oh yea, that’s right…you’re not suppose to!

Today’s Funny Friday is brought to you by my 4 year old, Christian.

Christian: Mom can we go to field trip (QuikTrip gas station) to get a donut?

Me: I don’t mind, but I have to take a shower first.

Christian: Why?

Me: Cause I haven’t showered yet and I’m starting to smell.

Christian: …don’t forget to wash your tate o tots (testicles).

Me: Girls don’t have testicles

Christian: Yes they do. And they’re musty so you have to wash them!

Have a wonderful Friday! Stay blessed